When we are emotionally attached to someone, it is often very hard to accept that the other person is no longer a part of your life, no matter how bad you want them to be. But one has to understand that life keeps going and being stuck in the past is not the solution. You have to accept it for what it is and understand that this is a very crucial time and you need to heal and be there for yourself. The person you need the most right now is you.
I can understand what this feeling is, and thus, from my experience, I will try my best to help you get through this. Here are a few things that helped me in this difficult phase.
1. Always remember that yes, it is very hard to see light in all this darkness, but as we all know that eventually, everything gets better. Do not think that the feeling of sadness, and being stuck will never go. Everything will be okay!
2. Go out more. Meet new people or spend time with your loved ones. Do new things. Follow your passions. Do something you love. Basically, you can not move on doing the same things; you have to do something new to give you this feeling of freshness and hope that you can be happy. I know that it is easier said than done, especially when you feel so overwhelmed that you feel like you can not do anything, even the little basic things. But understand that you have to create new memories so that the old ones can fade away.
3. Make yourself a priority. Give yourself as much time as you need to heal. Spend time with yourself. Connecting with yourself is equally important as connecting with others. Yes, going out, doing new things will help, but you can not just ignore these overwhelming emotions. Allow yourself to grieve. Take time out to journal, practice self care , and pamper yourself even if it as simple as following a skincare routine or getting a new haircut. Me time will help you to understand what the experience taught you and also to process everything so that you can heal and be ready for love again.
4. Cut off from them completely. You just can not move on while keep checking their socials and worrying about what they are up to. For this wound to heal, you can not keep touching it. It should be just you and things and people that make you happy.
5. Focus on the good. Even in difficult times, you can always find something to be grateful for. Practice gratitude. It will help you get out of this low vibrational energy and feel happy and peaceful again.
6. You have not missed the one. You just can not. Often we have this fear that what if he or she was the one and I have missed the opportunity? What is meant for you will always come to you no matter what . You can not mess it up. So, just relax, love will find you!
7. What if I never find true love? You will. And most importantly it will find you at the right time. Often the past wounds can make us believe that love does not exist and even if it does, you do not deserve it. One should understand that everyone has flaws and is deserving of love. Love will find you, I promise, and it will be so much beautiful than what you could have ever dreamed of.
8. If it was a toxic relationship, you might think that this is what a connection is, you have to compromise, maybe what you are asking for is too much and not real or you may hope that the other person will change for the better and you two will be happy again. So, hey! Let me tell you, you are too precious to wait for someone who does not deserve you and every single thing you dream of is real. It is just that you have not found the right person for you. Yes, it is hard to look beyond all this familiarity mistaking it for true love and fear that you can never find the love you dream of. But, understand that you owe it to yourself to be in peace. Do not let this negativity make you believe that it is all you deserve. Yes, forgiving the other person is important not for them but for your own self and one should also understand that nobody is all bad or good. Yes, people can change for the better, but you do not have to wait for someone just because it has potential. You deserve so much more. And trust me, after all these dark , you will love yourself even more, for being there with yourself, not letting yourself down, not waiting for someone who does not deserve it. You are just so amazing. Do not settle for less. Bigger and better things are waiting for you!
So ,
Hey! Just wanted to say that,
You will get through this. I know how strong you are and I can see you living your best life , feeling so happy and loved . It is amazing to be loved by someone but we often forget that how beautiful it is to love ourselves.
And remember healing is not linear. So buck up!